Stepping outside of my comfort zone is not only uncomfortable, it's outright nerve-wrecking. Every fiber of my being wants to retreat. My whole system is shutting down and rebelling. I want to close the door, go back the way I came, and forget all about this trying to make something of myself business. I knew there would be resistance, but this is ridiculous.
When my car was broken into again, for the second time in the past two months, my very first thought was that I didn't want to come back to the houseboat ever again. My boyfriend lives on a houseboat on Lake Union. There are a lot of transients living in the area. I'm from the suburbs. I'm used to not needing to lock my car doors at night. I thought it was enough to keep my trunk popper lever locked so the trunk couldn't be opened without the key. Turns out, that lock wasn't too difficult to break. In spite of my initial reaction, however, or because of it, I decided instead to move into the houseboat with my boyfriend. Maybe I'll be able to become a full-fledged Seattleite once I'm actually living here instead of just staying the night every day of the week.
Following the promptings of my inner voice is essential to reaching the goals I wish to attain. One word of advice to myself: my initial reaction is always wrong. If a thought occurs to me to take my backpack to work and I immediately think, "Why would I bother to take my backpack? It's not like I need it for anything today anyway," then I had darn well better take my backpack because I will certainly need it for some completely unforeseeable reason. I have experienced this reality on multiple occasions; I just wish I were able to learn from it already and get better at responding appropriately instead of constantly second-guessing myself.
When my car was broken into again, for the second time in the past two months, my very first thought was that I didn't want to come back to the houseboat ever again. My boyfriend lives on a houseboat on Lake Union. There are a lot of transients living in the area. I'm from the suburbs. I'm used to not needing to lock my car doors at night. I thought it was enough to keep my trunk popper lever locked so the trunk couldn't be opened without the key. Turns out, that lock wasn't too difficult to break. In spite of my initial reaction, however, or because of it, I decided instead to move into the houseboat with my boyfriend. Maybe I'll be able to become a full-fledged Seattleite once I'm actually living here instead of just staying the night every day of the week.
Following the promptings of my inner voice is essential to reaching the goals I wish to attain. One word of advice to myself: my initial reaction is always wrong. If a thought occurs to me to take my backpack to work and I immediately think, "Why would I bother to take my backpack? It's not like I need it for anything today anyway," then I had darn well better take my backpack because I will certainly need it for some completely unforeseeable reason. I have experienced this reality on multiple occasions; I just wish I were able to learn from it already and get better at responding appropriately instead of constantly second-guessing myself.
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